Recently I misplaced those clippings and was very sad because, as I have noted before, my memory is very poor and I don’t have a lot of recall about those days. The clippings serve to jog my memory about what it was like then. I feared that the clippings were lost forever, but I have come across them again, right where they should have been, just stuffed under some other things so I couldn’t see them.
The timeframe covered in the column was truly the “good old days” for me. I was on a much appreciated hiatus from depression – for the most part – and I was finding tremendous joy in my young family. The articles I wrote are not about depression; far from it. But I am enjoying rereading them and decided to share them on this blog in a “Friday Flashback” series starting this coming Friday. It won’t be a long series because I didn’t write the column for very long. I don’t recall why I stopped.
So how does my reminiscing about the past relate to “balancing life with depression?” It probably doesn’t, not for anyone but me. For me, the articles are a strong reminder of a time when I felt a strong sense of purpose and had vivacity and felt a pure joy in living. It’s been a long time since I have felt that way.
Of course, I am significantly older now, and my circumstances are quite different. I can’t go back to the good old days, nor do I want to. I’ve done a lot of living in the past 20 years, some of it pretty good, some of it about as dark as it gets. These articles are an inspiration for me to seek new happy experiences. I know it’s possible. I’ve been there.
So please bear with my self-indulgence, at least on Fridays for a while. Some of the articles will be revised to protect the “innocent,” but otherwise they will be presented as written. I hope you are able to enjoy them as I do, and I hope that they may inspire others to take a look at their lives and remember the good times; and to look forward, realizing that there are more good times to be had. It’s so easy to get tunnel vision when we are down, not being able to see anything but the hole we are in right now.
I know all about holes, and am grateful that I am having an opportunity to come up for air for a while. I want to ingrain my good memories into my mind so they will be there to draw upon when I next need them. And I really don’t mean to embarrass my daughters, but they were JUST SO CUTE!
They will understand when they have kids of their own.